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Learning about cars
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On
October 2, 1998, I became the proud recipient of my driver's
license. Although I vaguely knew that there would be some great
car-and-driver learning experiences up ahead, I had no idea what to
expect. Needless to say, I was in for quite a few surprises. For the
benefit of other clueless drivers, I decided I should share my tiny
fountain of knowledge.
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Chapter One: Oil
Lesson One: (I learned this lesson while driving
my father's 1988 Ford F150) Standard cars stall when you remove your
foot from the clutch before turning them off and you are not moving.
Lesson Two: In ALL cars, anytime they stall, little
lights come on. In this instance, the little CHECK ENGINE light does
not necessarily mean you have an engine problem, nor does the OIL
LIGHT mean you are low on oil.
Lesson Three: When
checking for oil, one uses the dipstick.
Lesson Four:
The dipstick IS NOT FOUND in the same place where you add the
oil. It's separate...
Lesson Five: Yes, it IS bad to
add too much oil to your car... this is why they invented the
dipstick in the first place...
Lesson Six: It is much
harder to remove oil than to add oil.
Chapter Two: Theft
Protection
Lesson One: Many cars are equipped
with a rather useless form of theft protection.
Lesson
Two: This theft protector is activated when you turn the
steering wheel while your car is not running.
Lesson
Three: Sometimes, it is good to use force on your car.
Lesson Four: The theft protector, which will not
allow you to turn your keys in the ignition in order to start your
car, can be deactivated by forcefully and rapidly turning the
steering wheel from side to side.
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